Spotlight #5: Iris

spotlight 5 header.png
I couldn’t find an iris, unfortunately…but this is a pretty flower too.

This Spotlight has been the most finicky one. I’ve written three full drafts of it, one about character voices in Enhanced, one about starting sentences when I was rewriting Enhanced, and one with snippets from the rewrite of Enhanced. But this post has nothing to do with Enhanced, so I’m crossing my fingers that it will work out. (Plus, the fourth time’s the charm, right?)

P.S. If you don’t know what a Spotlight is, the definition is “weekly hahhaha no excerpts, commentary, and random stuff about my writing”. Read my previous Spotlights here.


Anyway. The story.

I know I just talked last post about how I was starting a “new” writing project, The Blade. But you know those times when inspiration actually hits you? Yeah, you’ve just got to follow it. So I did.

Before I give you an excerpt (yay!), here’s some backstory & information on the short story, currently titled Iris.

A few years ago, one of my best friends and I wrote a novel called Eyes Closed, about…well, royalty, a throne, magic, and trust. One of the two main characters is a princess named Aleria, and this short story is a prequel about her parents’ story. (Because they die before the novel begins, we never get to know much about them.)

It’s probably actually going to end up being more of a novellette/novella instead of a short story, which isn’t good for The Blade, but eh–this is more fun! (Pro tip: Always write whatever is most fun. It’ll definitely help you finish things.)


And here’s your regularly scheduled excerpt!

There’s so many to choose from! *has small crisis* Okay, here’s one that should work (a.k.a. it’s not very spoilery, it includes both Garic & Iris, and I also just really like it).

She led him up a flight of stairs and knocked on a door. “Rosie? Are you awake?”

A few moments later, the answer came. “Come in.”

“I brought you a visitor,” said Iris, and he found he loved the smile of anticipation on her face as she opened the door.

He stepped inside to find a girl lying in bed. Though she was pale and obviously sick, she looked much like Iris, and he couldn’t help but smile at her wide, blue eyes.

Iris was smiling so widely that she could have rivaled the brightness of the sun. “Rose, this is Prince Garic. Prince Garic, this is Rose.”

“You can call me Rosie,” said the girl in the bed, a little shyly.

“Rosie. You have a name fit for a princess.”

If saying kind things to Rosie would make Iris smile at him like that again, he thought he’d never tire of it.

“Have you seen my garden?” whispered Rosie, nodding her head toward the window.

He was about to reply that he hadn’t, when he saw the handkerchiefs hanging down. He crossed the room to them. Beautiful flowers were embroidered on each one of them, each a different kind. Pansies, carnations, lilies, and a rose… He fingered it, knowing it was the one that Iris had been working on when he was last here.

Warmth flooded him as he looked at the flowers, then back at the two sisters. “It’s the most beautiful garden I’ve ever seen,” he said quietly, his voice wavering just slightly. “It rivals the castle’s.”

Rosie’s smile was beautiful and innocent, but he found Iris’s even more entrancing. She motioned subtly to the chair by Rosie’s bedside, and he sat down in it, unsure of what to say.

Rosie spoke first. “What is your favorite flower?”

Garic was tempted to say an iris, but he was sure that would leave Iris’s eyes shooting daggers at him, so he refrained. “Peonies. The yellow ones.”

“Iris,” Rosie breathed, “will you embroider me a peony next?”

He couldn’t help but wish that her smile was bestowed on him rather than Rosie as she spoke. “Of course.”


what think ye?

Do you like the excerpt? What do you think of Garic and Iris (and Rosie, of course)? Do you want to know more? Did I finally do this Spotlight justice? How often should I do Spotlights? And what are you currently writing? I want excerpts & commentary & random stuff about it!

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32 thoughts on “Spotlight #5: Iris

  1. Kellyn Roth May 10, 2017 / 5:02 PM

    OH MY GOODNESS THAT EXCERPT! I don’t know why, but I just love it to death! It’s so sweet and Rosie and Iris and the garden … *squeals*

    Do you like the excerpt?: Oops … I, um, already answered this … but YES!

    What do you think of Garic and Iris (and Rosie, of course)?: I thought Garic was a nice person and I love how he’s kinda-sorta trying to impress Iris and just be a good guy, and Iris sounds happy, and Rosie is a sweetheart. ❤

    Do you want to know more?: YES I DO! What is the plot? You didn't even say what the plot was. *glares*

    Did I finally do this Spotlight justice?: yes, you did. 🙂

    How often should I do Spotlights?: once or twice a month? Every other week or once a month? If you're not gonna do weekly anymore, that is. 🙂

    And what are you currently writing?: I'm putting aside most writing in favor of editing right now … although I keep on writing more on to TDS even though I'm just SUPPOSED to be editing. XD When does it stop? I should just force myself to quit. 😛

    Like

    • Lana May 11, 2017 / 5:55 PM

      YAYY I’m glad you love it! 😀 You’re pretty spot-on with your thoughts about the characters. 😛 Rosie is such a sweetheart and I adore her, but I also love Iris and Garic and just eek! I’m happy about this.

      Well, the plot is kind of spoilery…it’s a prequel to be read after reading the first book because it explains some things. But basically the plot is that Iris is famed to be like this “prophetess” and Garic is worried about someone trying to kill him (for several reasons), and so he goes to her for help. But that’s all you get. 😉

      Yeah, I’m kind of thinking bimonthly…but we’ll see. Maybe it would be weekly if I was blogging three times a week or something, but I don’t want to do that.

      Haha, I’m sure you’re just making it better. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      • Kellyn Roth May 11, 2017 / 6:08 PM

        It sounds awesome! I can’t wait to read it. Hopefully there will be more snippets soon …

        Yeah, well, if you’re only blogging once a week or less you can’t very well have it be weekly … that just wouldn’t work! Unless that was gonna be the only thing you blogged about … 😛

        Like

      • Lana May 12, 2017 / 10:27 PM

        Hopefully there will be more snippets! (Probably because I don’t think I’ll be done by the time another Spotlight rolls around, but maybe…)

        Hehe, yeah. I want to be posting twice a week, but sometimes it ends up only being once (and last month it was only once a MONTH)… I should probably post tomorrow. And I had an idea, too, but I didn’t write it down, and I can’t quite remember what it is…

        Liked by 1 person

      • Kellyn Roth May 13, 2017 / 12:59 PM

        (BELIEVE in yourself! But seriously, I hope you won’t be done, evil as that sounds, because I want to read more …)

        I have lots of blogging ideas that I don’t remember …

        Like

      • Lana May 13, 2017 / 5:43 PM

        (Haha, thanks! I think it’d be fun to share some more snippets, and I probably have another good 10k to write, so…)

        I actually did remember it! But it wasn’t very relevant, heh, so maybe later…

        Liked by 1 person

      • Kellyn Roth May 13, 2017 / 9:28 PM

        (Ooh, so it’s gonna be more of a novella! Or even a short novel. I love when books expand …)

        Like

    • Lana May 11, 2017 / 3:23 PM

      I’m glad, and thanks! 😉

      Like

  2. May @ Forever and Everly May 11, 2017 / 2:11 PM

    I SHIP LE SHIP.

    *drops mic*

    Okay XD Let’s say a little more in this comment shall we???

    IT IS WONDERFUL AND I WANT MORE AND PLEASE CAN I BETA BECAUSE I NEED. *cries*

    I’m currently brainstorming a fantasy novel (it’s going okayish???) and editing IMS. For a writing contest. 😉

    Like

    • Lana May 11, 2017 / 3:18 PM

      YAY IT IS MEANT TO BE SHIPPED 😀

      Well, it is the prequel for a novel that a friend & I wrote together, so if you don’t mind spoilers… (or, you know, you could read the actual book first, but it’s rather cringy, hehe).

      Oooh, fantasy novels! Is this your magic story that you’ve been mentioning? And that’s cool! What writing contest is it?

      Liked by 1 person

      • May @ Forever and Everly May 11, 2017 / 7:06 PM

        I DON’T MIND SPOILERS… I think. XD I JUST WANT TO READ YOUR WRITING.

        Yup, that’s the one! And it was a summer writing contest (in my state) that I entered last year and won… so I’m doing it again this time!

        Like

      • Lana May 12, 2017 / 10:23 PM

        Hehe, they are pretty minor spoilers…it’s more that the story makes more sense after reading the novel. 😛

        Oh wow, good job! That’s awesome & good luck! 😀

        Liked by 1 person

  3. katie May 11, 2017 / 2:28 PM

    SHIP SHIP SHIP SHIP SHIP SHIP SHIP IS REAL

    Yesssss i need to read this beta beta now ahh i love it! im currently writing “the living list” but meh its taking a while

    Like

    • Lana May 11, 2017 / 3:15 PM

      YAYYYY
      You really do need to beta this because you know which novel it is the prequel for? The CN 1? With Ryder & Aleria? Which we are finally going to start the sequel for soon! 😀

      Oooh, what’s it about? I like the title!

      Liked by 1 person

      • katie May 11, 2017 / 4:16 PM

        ahhh yes i loved CN 1!!! living list is about this kid named Forrest who lost his parents in a car crash. he meets this eternally optimistic chick named artemis, who helps him to see the things in the world worth living for, called “the living list” theres lots of heartfelt moments and midnight grocery store heists and yeahhhhh

        Like

      • Lana May 12, 2017 / 10:28 PM

        Ahhh I think I’ve heard a little bit about the characters but I didn’t know the storyline! That’s so cute!! I would love to go on midnight grocery store heists…it sounds awesome!

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Jordy Leigh May 12, 2017 / 2:35 AM

    Lana, I love this! Excerpts are such exciting teasers… I just soaked this one up. I think it’s so sweet the way that Iris and Rosie are endeared to each other (or so they seam, at least); it makes me really like them. Is Rosie sick? Is that why she’s in bed? And someone *cough* Garic *cough* seems quite obviously in love.

    I haven’t shared any excepts from my debut novella except for the two-or-three-sentence quote on the back cover before the blurb which I shared on my blog as part of my cover reveal on May 1st.

    Like

    • Lana May 12, 2017 / 10:20 PM

      Thank you! (Yes, they are endeared to each other; they’re sisters & they’re very close to one another). Rosie is actually paralyzed due to an unfortunate accident about a year ago. 😦 And Garic is quite in love, haha, though he probably wouldn’t admit it (and Iris isn’t exactly favorable to the idea, either).

      I saw that post! I just hadn’t responded because I wasn’t sure whether I’d have time to beta read this month. I would like to, but I’ve been pretty busy with school. And I’d love to read some excerpts from it! That would be awesome. 😀

      Like

      • Jordy Leigh May 15, 2017 / 2:32 AM

        Oh, what great and lively personalities, Lana! Even from the one except and your description of them here in the comments, they seem really well-written and easy to relate to.

        Wise move not to commit to something you probably don’t have time for. 😉 I could learn from you in that department because seriously, I’m way too quick to agree to something, and then I find that myself in a right mess!

        Like

      • Lana May 15, 2017 / 3:30 PM

        Aww, thank you!

        Haha, but I might be able to do some of it, if not all. Would you like me to try to read as much as I can and I can give you feedback on that?

        Liked by 1 person

      • Jordy Leigh May 15, 2017 / 9:48 PM

        Hmmm, it depends. Would it be an added pressure for you? I mean, I would love for you to read my book, even just as a friend and not a beta reader… but it wouldn’t be beneficial or fun for either of us if it became a chore. Let me know, and if you’d like, one of us or the other can make contact via email and I can send it to you. 🙂

        Like

      • Lana May 22, 2017 / 2:58 PM

        No, I’d love to read it! Would you like me to email you?

        Like

      • Jordy Leigh May 27, 2017 / 2:24 AM

        Yes! In that case, I would love to! Could you please either tell me where I can find your email address or contact me first at me[at]jordyleigh[dot]com? 🙂

        Like

      • Lana June 9, 2017 / 7:02 PM

        This is a little bit late…but I’ll email you, if that’s okay. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Abigail May 12, 2017 / 6:38 PM

    That excerpt tho! So sweet oh my goodness! 😍😍😍

    Like

    • Lana May 12, 2017 / 10:14 PM

      Aww, thank you! I’m glad you enjoyed it & thanks for reading! 😀

      Like

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